Some preachers came to my door and wanted to talk to me about Truth. The one truth that trumps all other truths, you know, their truth. My truth was not real. My experiences, imaginary. Of course, I am crazy! I mean, come on, why would I trust myself if I had absolute logic and proof right in front of me?
I tried to tell them that I already spent enough time in a cult. Yes, a place that didn’t allow my truth, but forced me to be, not a person, not even a shadow, maybe a fly hiding behind a shadow. Yes, that’s about as big as my voice was. Maybe I was the Who (From Horton Hear’s a Who)…..remembering. Oh, you should have seen how polite I was! I even entertained conversation for a moment—to later regret it.
They wanted to talk to me about having a “direct path to God”. Do people still believe this shit!!? Ohmygosh…
It makes me sick to the deepest parts of my stomach that one person, religion, organization, group, gathering, etc. would write off someone’s valid spiritual experience as not real because they don’t understand it. What is real to you is real to you, period. After all, how does a person qualify experience anyway? Can you measure enlightenment? Can you save inspiration in a quart jar? What about the “Aha!” moment? Can you graph it out and see whose “Aha!” runs strongest? Can you bottle up joy like they bottled up screams in Monsters, Inc.? Can you measure the inches of inner peace?
When you refuse to honor another person’s experience, whether spiritual or non—-, what you do is not give place to the most sacred part of who they are. You, in some way, disallow that thing that makes them uniquely human. You un-dignify them. If they follow you they give up their freedom and become a slave in a very deep way, and breaking free causes so much heartache! Just ask me, I’ve done this at least three times! (How many times does it take for a person to learn?).
I still can’t believe I was so patient with those guys. “They will find their way”, I thought to myself later on. Something about that whole scenario seemed not ok to me. It was eerily wrong.